"Expecting others to read your mind is delusional. But... But... I... I..It's not empty words I'm after. There was something else I desired all along. Not mutual understanding, friendship, companionship, or anything of the sort. I don't care about being understood. I simply wish to understand. Understand, know, and rest easy in that knowledge-- gain some peace of mind. Wanting to know people inside-out because being in the dark terrifies me is an awfully self-indulgement, egoistic, and arrogant wish. It's downright despicable and disgusting. Having a desire like that makes me sick to the stomach! But if it's at all possible to share that desire-- if it's possible to have a relationship where you're free to burden one another with that repulsive self-gratification...I know that it's out of the question! I know that it's out of my reach! Even so! Even so, I... I want something genuine".